Managing stress

What can be done to manage stress?

To make sure that we are fit to respond to the challenge of stress there are some simple things we can do:

Maintaining Physical and Emotional Health
Organisational skills
Relaxation
Emotional intelligence
Positive thinking
Assertiveness

Maintaining Physical and Emotional Health

Health awareness is about being in tune with your body’s normal functions and noticing when things go wrong. The key to good health is moderation in all things. It is important to remember that your lifestyle cannot be separated from your mental and physical health. A healthy lifestyle which pays attention to healthy eating, keeping fit, and relaxation, not smoking and sensible drinking, will help you to stay alert and cope with change. It can help to prevent heart disease, strokes, joint problems and cancers. The answer lies in awareness of risk, in maintaining regular health checks, and being aware of early warning signs.

Keep fit

Regular exercise will boost your coping capacity and help you respond positively to pressure. Exercise will also make you stronger and improve your mobility. It will help protect you against heart disease, osteoporosis and many other chronic conditions. Exercise is proven to protect against stress and depression as it releases feel-good ‘hormones’, known as ‘endorphins’, in the brain. It is very important that you check with your GP before taking on any vigorous or new exercise regimes.

Nutrition and a healthy diet

Your diet needs to be well balanced and include at least 5 portions of fruit and vegetables a day, plus foods rich in starches, fibre and roughage and you should drink up to 2 litres of water a day. Try and choose fish or lean cuts of meat and poultry, as opposed to fatty cuts of red meat. It is a good idea to avoid eating salty and very sugary foods too frequently.

Sensible Drinking

In moderation alcohol is unlikely to damage your health, although too much can damage health in the long-term. It can affect your blood pressure, stomach, brain and liver. Medical advice suggests a maximum of 14 units a week for females and 21 units for men. One unit is equivalent to one 25ml measure of 40% spirits or a half pint of (3.6%) beer/lager. There are 1.4 units in a 125ml glass of (11%) wine. The units are measured on the strength of the alcohol (ABV) the higher the number is, the more units you are consuming.

Smoking

Smoking increases the risk of heart and lung disease, especially bronchitis and lung cancer. It also reduces the chance of survival after a heart attack. Research has shown that giving up smoking, even after a long time, reduces the chances of heart problems significantly.

Caffeine

Most of you have a cup of tea or coffee in the morning “to wake you up”. Caffeine increases your cortisol levels which is linked to stress, therefore it is important to limit the amount of caffeine intake. Caffeine can be found in coffee, tea, energy drinks, cola and chocolate bars. We all react differently to caffeine so there is no “safe limit” but in general we should not be consuming more than 400mg per day which is about 4 mugs of coffee and this should be halved if you’re pregnant.

Organisational skills

How much of your potential stress during the day is due to the fact that meetings seem to appear out of nowhere and use up spare time you had allocated for other tasks, or you take on work, but never seem to find time to actually do it (apart from after-hours). Maybe you find that deadlines are upon you before you realise what has happened or there is confusion over who should be doing what.

For many people, one of the main contributing factors to their stress levels, is the fact that they do not feel that they have any control over their day or their workload. By following a few simple rules to help manage your day-to-day workload, you may well be surprised at what a difference it can make.

A creative and adaptive approach to organising yourself and to problem solving will make it easier for you to resolve any practical problems you may face. Here are some ideas:

One diary

Just use one diary, either an electronic one on your PC or a paper-based pocket diary. This will prevent double bookings and missed appointments, plus make it easier to see at a glance when you are going to be very busy.

Don’t book appointments back-to-back

Allow yourself time in between meetings and appointments to gather your thoughts, make notes, sort out action points or just take a break. Otherwise you’ll be trying to do it all at the end of the day.

Diary “desk” time

Allocate yourself time for doing admin work, it still takes up your time so treat it as a meeting – block out the time in your diary and don’t let other people encroach on it.

Diary leisure or Personal time

Put these in your diary and value it with equal importance to your other appointments.

Be realistic

Allow a realistic amount of time per job. Don’t agree to timescales you cannot meet. It is better to have too much time to do a task than too little. It is always much easier to fit an extra job into your spare time, than to always be behind with your main tasks.

Communicate

Make sure that everybody involved in a project is aware and in agreement to timescales. One person unable to deliver on time can disrupt the work plans of other.

Consider “other” elements

Everyone needs comfort breaks and refreshments. Plan and take breaks. Travel time – allow for delays and enough time to refresh yourself upon arrival. Plan in advance whenever possible. Being prepared can save you time.

Structured approaches to time management

There are several types of Time Management courses. Ask what is available through your Manager and choose the most appropriate course for your needs.

Relaxation

Developing your ability to completely relax and unwind when you have had a demanding day will help you to maintain our optimism and capacity to continue to function when the pressures continue from day-to-day.

Why do relaxation techniques?

When you become tense, upset or nervous, certain muscles in the body tighten. When this happens, you may also feel hot and sweaty, on edge, or that your heart is racing. Your breathing quickens, and is shallower, although you may not always notice it.

The Benefit

By relaxing yourself first, you can prepare yourself to meet difficult situations, like talking in front of a lot of people or to your boss, or to a stranger, or when trying to do something difficult at work for the first time. You can manage better in most situations by being relaxed, but alert, in the situation itself. You can also relax afterwards to get over any tension which has built up.

By regularly setting aside time to relax, you will become a calmer, more confident person, who is better able to handle daily problems and stresses.

Breathing correctly

An important part of being able to relax effectively is learning how to control your breathing properly. Here is an exercise to help you do this:

[Please remember to consult your GP before undertaking any new exercise regime or if this exercise causes you any discomfort.]

Breathing Awareness

Lie down on the floor.
Place one hand on your abdomen and the other on your chest.
Inhale slowly and deeply through your nose into your abdomen to push your hand up as much as feels comfortable.
Exhale through your mouth making a quiet whooshing noise as you blow out gently.
Continue to breathe in and out slowly.

With practice you can slow your breathing down to about 4-5 breaths per minute. You should practice diaphragmatic breathing for about 10 minutes per day for greatest benefit.

Emotional intelligence

Knowing how to manage our emotions and manage our relationships with others can support you in effectively managing challenging situations.

https://www.helpguide.org/

Positive thinking

Cultivating a positive attitude will help you to deal with pressure effectively.

Types of unhelpful/irrational thinking

(adapted from David Burns: The Feeling Good Handbook, 1989)

All-or-nothing thinking

You see things in black or white categories. If a situation falls short of perfect, you see it as a total failure. Example: when a young woman on a diet ate a spoonful of ice cream, she told herself: “I’ve blown my diet completely.” This thought upset her so much that she gobbled down an entire tub of ice cream!

Over-generalisation

You see a single negative event (e.g. a romantic rejection) as a constant pattern of defeat by using words such as “always” or “never” when you think about it. Example: a manager reviewed his quarterly performance figures saying: “These figures are so bad; the team is so unreasonable”.

Mental filter

You pick out a single negative detail and dwell on it exclusively, so that your vision of all reality becomes bleak. Example: You receive many positive comments about your presentation at work, but one colleague says something mildly critical. You become obsessed with his reaction for days and ignore all the positive feedback.

Jumping to conclusions

You interpret things negatively when there are no facts to support your conclusion.

Mind reading – Without checking it out, you conclude that someone is reacting negatively to you (Example: You meet someone new at work who then moves to talk to another colleague. You say to yourself “I know they don’t like me”)

Fortune telling – You predict that things will turn out badly. Before a test you may tell yourself, “I’m really going to blow it. What if I fail?” If you’re depressed you may tell yourself, “I’ll never get better”.

Should statements

You tell yourself that things should be the way you hoped or expected them to be. Example: After playing a difficult piece on the piano, a gifted pianist told herself: “I shouldn’t have made so many mistakes”. This made her feel so disgusted that she stopped practising for several days. “Must”, “ought” and “have to” are similar offenders.

Should statements that are directed against yourself lead to guilt and frustration. Should statements that are directed against other people or the world in general lead to anger and frustration: “He shouldn’t be so stubborn and argumentative”. Many people try to motivate themselves with shoulds and should nots, as if they were delinquents who had to be punished before they could be expected to do anything. “I shouldn’t eat that doughnut”. This usually doesn’t work because all these shoulds and musts make you feel rebellious and you get the urge to do just the opposite.

We are all susceptible to these ways of thinking when we are under stress, but they are habits you can become aware of and try to stop. Thinking more positively will lead to more positive feelings about yourself.

Assertiveness

Maintaining an awareness of the importance speaking up for yourself and saying ‘no’ when you need to will help you to avoid feeling that you have no choice.

Assertiveness means:

Respecting myself, that is who I am and what I do.
Taking responsibility for myself, that is for how I feel and what I think and do. For example, “I feel angry when you put me down” is more assertive than “you make me feel angry when you put me down”.
Recognising my own needs and wants independently of others, that is separate from what is expected of me in particular roles, such as ‘wife’, ‘husband’, ‘daughter’, ‘son’, etc.
Making clear “I” statements about how I feel and what I think. For example, “I feel very uncomfortable with this decision”. “I think it’s a good idea to draw up an action plan”.
Allowing myself to make mistakes, that is recognising that sometimes I will make a mistake and that is OK to make mistakes.
Allowing myself to enjoy my successes, that is validating myself and what I have done and sharing it with others.
Changing my mind, if and when I choose to.
Asking for “thinking it over” time. For example, when people ask me to do something and I need time to consider whether or not to do it, “I would like to think it over and I will let you know my decision by the end of the week”.
Asking for what I want, rather than hoping someone will notice what I want and moaning later that I didn’t get what I wanted.
Setting clear boundaries. For example, “I know that you would like me to visit you and thank you for inviting me. I am however unable to come this weekend and would like to visit you later in the year”.
Recognising that I have a responsibility towards others, rather than being responsible for others. As adults we have responsibility for and towards our children which is different from having responsibility towards each other as adults.
Respecting other people and their right to be assertive.

Help and treatment for stress

Many people delay seeking help when they are overwhelmed by stress and pressure as they feel it is an admission of failure. Well, it’s not. If you feel that you are struggling to manage on your own, that’s the time to ask for professional guidance. If you are worried about the impact of stress you can discuss concerns with your GP for advice about appropriate treatments. Medication may be prescribed for a short period and in some cases a GP may refer you for counselling. And remember – professional advice is there to help you, in confidence.

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